Individual, relationship and group Counselling
I am an integrative counsellor meaning I have experience in many theories and practice of counselling. I use this knowledge and experience to work with you as an individual, a family or within relationships. Each of us within a group or as individuals have unique needs we require to grow and develop. I have worked with families, young people individuals, groups and relationships for over 20 years. My passion is to see people thrive and become their best versions.
Many people worry about talking to others because the stigma that can surround Addiction. People who have and do struggle with addiction can tell you of the powerful hold it has over us as human beings. Sometimes to break free we need a helping hand. Addiction is difficult to beat but beating it alone is even harder nearly impossible sometimes. Have you tried many times without success? The very core of addiction is feeling out of control and feeling very alone.
It is commonly recognised that those who want to overcome addiction will need counselling to help tackle the underlying issues and cause of the addictive behaviour.
Many people combat drug and alcohol addiction, but others are challenged with addictions such as gambling, sex, shopping, pornography and other dependences. I have experience of working with many different addictions successfully.
Tackling addiction with a counsellor can help reduce the stigma, the loneliness, fear and frustration leading on to a more hopeful positive outcome,
Child and adolescent therapy.
Many challenges and rewards come from counselling children and adolescents. Counselling children and adolescents is very different to counselling adults and requires different experience and skills. Teenagers struggle with different issues than younger children and adults such as identity struggles, extreme peer pressure and fitting in. They often feel stuck between wanting independence and still needing guidance. Teens are more likely than adults to make decisions without considering the consequences and feel invincible. Therapists must understand the developmental challenges of teens to provide effective counselling to them. I have many years’ experience of working in this area and my vision is to see every child and teenager I see on a path of strong self-belief self-empowerment and a adapted strong sense of identity.
Anger is a normal emotion we all have experienced. Whether it’s anger at another person for something, or anger over the various injustices in the world, anger is a common human feeling and response. The there is a difference, however, between occasionally getting angry and having anger issues. And for those whose anger goes beyond the occasional, there are some very clear signs that you have anger issues.
The best place to look for signs that you’ve got issues with anger is with the people closest to you. Most people can do a pretty good job hiding anger from friends and coworkers, but it's our loved ones who see us when we're the most real. They’re the ones we feel closest to and safest with, so, unfortunately, they’re the ones we’re most likely take our anger out on. And for some of us it happens so often that it becomes a problem. Regular anger can cause difficulties with relationships, families and jobs
Sometimes it may be appropriate to use the services of a professional counsellor or psychotherapist to help with anger issues. If you do decide to seek help I can work with you in an individual way to help you overcome the anger.
Borderline personality disorder
WHAT ARE THE SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER?
There are nine main symptoms that characterise Borderline Personality Disorder with the official criteria for a diagnosis requiring at least five of the following to be present:
Fear of Abandonment: To someone with BPD, the thought of being abandoned is a very real possibility, however unlikely it is to happen. It can lead to highly co-dependent relationships and be a great source of friction with friends, family and lovers.
Unstable Relationships: Due to the fear of abandonment and fluctuations in mood, unstable relationships are a common occurrence. They’re often viewed in extremes of being either perfect or terrible – also known as ‘idealisation’ and ‘devaluation,’ respectively.
Unclear Sense of Identity: Also known as an ‘identity disturbance, 'this stems having such low self-worth that the need is felt to constantly be looking for a way to boost esteem by making changes in appearance, friends, relationships, values, goal and even sexual orientation.
Impulsive Behaviours: These behaviours often linked to self-destructive tendencies, low sense of esteem or the need to seek attention.They include activities such as reckless spending, binge eating, substance abuse and other risky behaviours.
Self-Harm & Suicidal Behaviour: This can be another common occurrence and usually the result abandonment issues, emotional swings and emptiness weighing heavily on the individual. Suicidal behaviour is not only limited to attempted acts but also includes thoughts and threats.
Erratic Emotions: The emotional swings of BPD are different from normal fluctuations in mood in that they’re more intense, usually occurring over a matter of hours. They’re also often triggered by trivial events that might otherwise be shrugged off by others.
Extreme Episodes of Anger: Anger issues have been linked heavily with abandonment and unmet expectations within inter-personal relationships. If someone with BPD feels they’re being shunted, it’s not uncommon for them to display anger disproportionate to the situation.
Feelings of Emptiness: People with BPD might often talk about feeling ‘hollow’ or referring to how they’re ‘nothing’ inside. This often feeds into the tendency towards the shifting sense of identity and engaging in impulsive behaviours as a way of trying to compensate for the perceived lack of self.
Dissociating/Losing Touch With Reality: Dissociation and stress-related paranoia is often a side effect of emotional instability and fear of abandonment, causing the individual to be suspicious of other’s motives. It can make reasoning with someone who has BPD extremely challenging.
Whether you are struggling to come out, are transitioning, curious about your gender identity, living with or affected by HIV/AIDS, stress, anxiety, depression, addiction, abuse(s) or experience challenges in your relationship(s) (poly+/kink+). I can work with you to find solutions to challenges. I have worked with LGBTQ community for over 15 years.
LGBTQ Counselling is a place where human rights are respected and where lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans, two spirit and queer people, and their friends and allies, are all welcomed and supported.
Anxiety, Panic attacks
“Anxiety is terrible, you could be having an attack and no one would even know, because it's an inward thing. It feels like you're malfunctioning and you can't process your own thoughts. You get a knot in your stomach and you can't take a full breath, but outwardly you can literally just sit there and look completely normal, as long as no one tries to speak to you.”
Types of anxiety disorder
There are several different classified anxiety disorders. Each one features different types of symptoms that can, in some cases, be triggered by specific situations.
Panic disorder (PD): This involves at least two panic attacks accompanied by the constant fear of future attacks. People with panic disorder may lose a job, refuse to travel or leave their home, or completely avoid anything they believe will trigger an attack of anxiety.
Generalised anxiety disorder (GAD): This is a constant state of worry about a number of events or activities in the persons life.
Phobic disorder: This features an incapacitating and irrational fear of an object or situation, for example, a fear of spiders or open spaces (claustrophobia). Most adults with phobic disorder are aware that their fear is irrational.
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD): This condition is marked by unwanted repeated thoughts (obsessions) and behaviours (compulsions).
“The counsellor helped me understand that I was triggering more panic by not permitting myself to accept what was happening to me in the second. Panic attacks aren’t essentially bad or destructive. It’s a physical resistance to an emotional response.
thanks to my practise in therapy, I am grateful to say I haven’t experienced another panic attack.”
Feeling down from time to time is a normal part of life, but when emotions such as hopelessness and despair take hold and just won’t go away, you may have depression. Depression makes it tough to function and enjoy life like you once did. Just trying to get through the day can be overwhelming. But no matter how hopeless you feel, you can get better. By understanding the cause of your depression and recognising the different symptoms and types of depression, you can take the first step to feeling better and overcoming the problem.. As someone with lived experience of depression i can help you first hand on the path to recovery.
Stress, Trauma, PTSD.
What is PTSD?
Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can develop following any event that makes you fear for your safety. Most people associate PTSD with rape or battle-scarred soldiers—and military combat is the most common cause in men. But any event, or series of events, that overwhelms you with feelings of hopelessness and helplessness and leaves you emotionally shattered, can trigger PTSD. This may happen especially if the event feels unpredictable and uncontrollable.
PTSD can affect people who personally experience the traumatic event, those who witness the event, or those who pick up the pieces afterwards, such as emergency workers and law enforcement officers. PTSD can also result from surgery performed on children too young to fully understand what’s happening to them.
PTSD vs. a normal response to traumatic events
Following a traumatic event, almost everyone experiences at least some of the symptoms of PTSD. When your sense of safety and trust are shattered, it’s normal to feel unbalanced, disconnected, or numb. It’s very common to have bad dreams, feel fearful, and find it difficult to stop thinking about what happened. These are normal reactions to abnormal events.
For most people, however, these symptoms are short-lived. They may last for several days or even weeks, but they gradually lift. But if you have post-traumatic stress disorder, the symptoms don’t decrease. You don’t feel a little better each day. In fact, you may start to feel worse. I will work with you in a safe environment to approach these symptoms and help you using researched techniques and solutions.
Developing a sense of self or an identity is an essential part of every individual becoming mature. Identity or parts of identity may be classified by any number of things such as religion, gender, or ethnicity.
One may find themselves struggling with identity issues which lead to depression, hopelessness, addiction, and more. Counselling offers a place in which people may discuss the issues related to their identity. Through Counselling, people may reduce their depression, find ways to cope with struggles associated with their identity issues, and ultimately find themselves in the process.
Psychological Conditions Associated with Identity Issues
Certain mental health conditions may give an individual a distorted view of their identity. For example:
Someone with codependency may rely on others' opinions to form their sense of self.
Someone with depression may falsely believe they are "worthless" or unloved.
Someone with delusions of grandeur might believe they are a spiritual figure or a celebrity.
Someone with generalized amnesia may forget who they are altogether.
In dissociative identity disorder (DID), a person may develop multiple identities called "alters." These alters often have distince personalities, mannerisms, and so on. A person may have gaps in their memory from when another identity was active. Therapy for DID often aims to integrate alters into one cohesive self.
Issues I work with
Borderline personality disorders,
Disassociation and depersonalisation
Disassociation and depersonalisation
Grief, Infertility, Infidelity, Internet Addiction, Life Coaching, Obsessive-Compulsive (OCD), Peer Relationships, Relationship Issues
School Issues, young people and children expert,
Adults, Children, and Adolescents
Individuals and Couples